I was bound to do this article some time or the other as well. I had done a similar article detailing the different traits and characteristics of the TF2 classes and how they seem so similar to the people we meet everyday.
Similar to the classes in TF2, the band of survivors are a colorful bunch that have different backgrounds, lives, and personalities. From their voice responses and quotes in-game, one can infer what their personality is like. Here is your chance to meet the survivors in reality.
The Survivors
Prerequisite: Must be fairly skilled or trained with weaponry or battle tactics (or have street smarts)
OR
Immunized for most diseases and maladies/capable of recovering from common infections
Bill
Personality and Traits: Tough, experienced and tends to be more mature (age-wise and mentally!) than the others. The natural leader of the pack and has seen everything. Sometimes has a rough and gruff demeanor. May be the outcast of the group. Crabbiness tends to be just a coat of armor. Has rough times and a past with people associated to Francis (a guy relationship thing)
Likely Jobs: Drifter, war veteran, PE coach. Usually unemployed or in a dead end job. Can be found in a soup kitchen or something similar to that e.g. Salvation Army
Likeability Factor: 3 out of 5 as an average. Doesn’t really hate anybody, though he/she acts like it.
Francis
Personality and Traits: Mischievous and playful. Has a gruff, tough demeanor, though not as serious as Bill. Is the rebel, the dropout, the person who usually goes after girls and earns a notorious reputation. Is the joker of the group and sometimes the comic relief. Likes leather clothing and tattoos. Somewhat of an outdoorsman. Likes to mock people associated with Bill (a guy relationship thing). A prick
Likely Jobs: Biker, gang member, comedian, tattoo artist, outdoorsman (Hunting animals)
Likeability Factor: 2 out of 5 since some people see Francis’s as pricks. 4 out of 5 if one gets to know him- can be pretty darn funny. (”Get your ass up!…that’s what he said”)
Louis
Personality and Traits: Your run-of-the-mill white collar worker. Tends to have a very orderly, predictable life with little changes and interesting things. Life tends to get a little boring sometimes. A regular member of society, usually the one who does all the paperwork. Smarter than the rest, people associated with Louis are the younger generation. Just your average Joe with something special on the side. Not usually too willing to fight. Tends to take a more diplomatic approach unlike Bill’s and Francis’s.
Likely Jobs: Store manager, executive, whatever white-collar-paperwork-associated-mediocre-to-six-figure-salary jobs you can think of.
Likeability Factor: 4 out of 5: quite agreeable and able to get along with.
Zoey
Personality and Traits: Somewhat similar to Louis, though younger at heart and age-wise. One of the smarter ones (though grades aren’t that great). Has a fondness for horror movies and other things not too many people are interested in. Upbeat hip character like most young people these days. Your run-of-the-mill teenager, as one can say. Gets along well with Louis’s, as they are similar. Relationship with Francis’s can be a little rocky at first.
Likely Jobs: student, internship, assistant. Not too many available jobs in this economy, eh?
Likeability Factor: 3.5 out of 5: Okay for most people, though may think Zoeys are a little obnoxious (teenagers…).
Chicago Ted
Personality and Traits: Egotistical, very powerful
Likely Jobs: Zombie killer. Chuck Norris impersonator/trainer
Likeability Factor: 4 out of 5 if meeting survivors. If infected, it goes somewhere in the negatives.
The Scout Churchguy
Personality and Traits: Nervous. Very very nervous and paranoid. Very cautious, neat freak, unstable mind. Easily frightened and spooked. Not very compatible with the above people.
Likely Jobs: Bellringer
Likeability Factor: 2 out of 5. Nobody likes him when he gets paranoid.
None of the above? Perhaps you are one of the infected! (No likability factors for the following- not enough information given from the game to make any inferences).
The Infected
Prerequisite: Easily prone to infections and diseases- weak immune systems
OR
Part of the 53, 595 people living in Fairfield or any nearby place as of October 31, 2008.
The Hunter
Personality and Traits: Athletic, likes to wear hoodies. You are capable of sneaking around fairly well, and people can’t find you easily. Hunters grow out their fingernails and are capable of opening (ripping) things. Fast runner, likes to jump people just to scare the heck out of them (or to kill them).
Likely Jobs: Track star, long-jump athlete
The Smoker
Personality and Traits: Smokes cigarettes, usually breaks up groups. Smokers can be seen by some people as being perverted in an unusual way. Most likely to make people ditch others unintentionally.
Likely Jobs: Food-taster, guy who breaks up fights (not the bouncer though)
The Boomer
Personality and Traits: Fat, or somewhat on the chubby side. Likes to eat, has a weak stomach, and is usually picked on by the other people above. Boomers usually buy clothing that are too small for them (or they grow out of them).
Likely Jobs: Gourmand, restaurant proprietor.
The Tank
Personality and Traits: Tough, very muscular, likes to work out a lot. Very rough with anybody, and takes lots of vitamin supplements. Tanks endure much, but can be angered very easily. Tends to have a macho attitude and is the next infected story I’m typing up 
Likely Jobs: Work-out trainer, PE coach, baseball player (Barry Bonds), bouncer.
The Witch
Personality and Traits: Almost always a female. Depressed very easily and has suicidal thoughts. People who just recently broke up with somebody. Found huddling in a corner, sobbing uncontrollably. Capable of lashing out in anger with incredibly long, sharp, and durable fingernails. Unconsolable. For some reason, tends to lack clothing.
Likely Jobs: Nothing. Goth kid, emo girl
So the next time you see your little brother catch a fly using his tongue or a classmate that starts growing out a beard at the tender age of 13, just remember- everybody has a little bit of Left 4 Dead in them.
L4D: Meet the Survivors and Infected in Reality!
